The 6 Worst Things a Newcomer Can Do in a Casino

It turns out that everything is not as simple as it seems. As a casino worker, you need to be incredibly focused and alert while the people around you get drunk. You also need to be able to react quickly to situations and smile all the time, even if you are communicating with an incredible number of assholes.

Stress aside, there are at least a lot of weird and wonderful things to see. Casinos attract those other characters, which is both good and bad. This means you have to deal with everyone, from gamblers who are confident that the next spin will make them incredibly rich, to tragic old people who lose their retirement to crazy teenagers at a time, betting their last ten dollars on blackjack, counting on a few free glasses. beer. Apparently, many, at first glance, sane people really lose their minds when they see money go nowhere.

Six casino workers told me their funniest stories. All of the following stories are told by different people.

Eggs

Many players have various superstitions and an algorithm of actions that they meticulously follow when placing bets. For example, some people only bet with their left hand, others start swearing and chanting little mantras before placing a bet. I once saw a man who threw salt into an ashtray every time the croupier turned the wheel. He did this to scare away evil spirits, of course.

When I was working as a waitress in a casino in Bucharest, a big player asked me to bring something to eat, but I could only do this after the wheel stopped turning, otherwise I could jinx him, he said. I waited patiently, and then went over to receive his order. When I came back to ask if he wanted a drink, I saw that the guy shoved his hand into his pants and crumpled his balls.

I thought I was hallucinating, but it was clear that everyone else noticed it too. Surely this is how he attracted good luck. Every time the wheel spun, the guy put his hand in his pants and did the same.

Eat it

Being the “eye in the sky” – the guy who watches the security cameras all night, I’ve seen a lot of really weird things. The craziest thing happened at a casino in Nairobi, Kenya. The client went to the roulette wheel and split the money into two thirds of all the numbers. Pretty good odds, you might say, but he lost anyway. When he realized this, he suddenly became agitated. He grabbed all the money before the dealer could collect it and started to run. The guard quickly pinned him to the wall, but as soon as the guy realized that he had no chance to escape, he put the bills in his mouth, trying to swallow them.

Another guard immediately appeared. The two of them twisted the guy and made him spit out the cash. Without thinking twice, the guards threw them on the table with a tape measure – wet and rumpled. The croupier called the cleaning lady, and she brought an electric hairdryer. Once the money was dry, it was leveled and returned to the game. I really have no idea what happened to that guy.

royal plum

For many years I worked as a casino observer on cruise ships. One day, at about 6 am, the casino where I was working was empty. There was only an American woman playing slot machines. This woman was finishing, she had already won several thousand dollars. At some point, she needed to go to the toilet, but she was sure that someone would steal her winnings if she was absent. Some players are a little paranoid, and that was her case. Even when they know that my colleagues and I are watching everything on TV screens.

And so, instead of going to the toilet or at least calling an employee, she went to the slot machines, took off her pants and did it right there. Having relieved herself, she returned to the slot machines – and this is two meters from her own shit, and continued to play as if nothing had happened. When an employee passed by to see how she was doing, he smelled something terrible. He quickly realized what it was and asked the woman what had happened. With an absolutely honest face, she declared that she vaguely remembered that someone had walked there.

Anyway, it was all shown on cable TV. When I was writing my report, it took all my self-control to remain a professional and not write: “She gave a hell of a shit at the slot machines.” When the news went on the air, a guard went to her room to inquire about the incident. Her husband, learning about everything, immediately asked to be moved to another room. Apparently this was the end of their vacation.

Complete failure

Back in 2009, I worked at the opening of a casino in Bucharest. Everything was very glamorous and the owners expected rivers of cash to flow. I had good experience with roulette, so my manager expected me to work as a croupier at night. Five minutes into the opening, three men sat down and handed me a hefty wad of cash to exchange for tokens. I was a little stunned, but I tried to pull myself together and make the first spin. With trembling hands, I threw the ball, but it flew back and got stuck under the door leading to the kitchen. I started to sweat a lot. I smiled and apologized while the waiter brought the balloon back.

I made another spin, but the same thing happened. Although this time the ball landed at the drummer’s feet on stage. “Fuck,” I muttered to myself. The men looked at me in surprise, one even asked if I was a beginner. I tried to get out by joking that I used too much cream. Thank God they laughed, and I was slowly gaining control over myself. When the waiter handed me the ball again, I noticed that half of the casino was looking at me and praying that I would screw up again. People always say that “God loves a trinity,” and that turned out to be true, because the ball flew out and landed in the player’s glass of whiskey, splattering booze over his tuxedo. I had been preparing for the opening for five months, but I could not even turn the wheel.

Big Brother

One night when I was working as a dealer, a player lost about $ 56,000. I’m sure he was sober – he drank soft drinks all night and doesn’t seem to have tasted anything stronger. But suddenly he started talking to the security team through surveillance cameras. He looked straight into the lens and swore. He shouted that there are magnets in the balls, that it was all one big swindle. He noticed that the cameras were turning, and therefore became even more paranoid: “And now you are staring at me. You are watching! You took my money and now you are laughing at me, right? ”

He grabbed an ashtray and tried to smash the camera with it. It is clear that by this moment the guards rushed into the hall. I’m a little sorry for the guy: the security camera operators were dying of laughter.

Cool power

I worked as a secretary in a Bucharest casino. One day such a huge guy, almost seven feet tall, with a beer belly, decided to start playing at 8 in the morning. I should have guessed that he would create problems as soon as he entered: he had a very concentrated expression on his face. When he checked in, I noticed a yellow mark next to his name. Yellow marks mean one of two things: you are either a big player or a malicious cheater. He could be anyone. He was allowed to play, but on condition that I notify the guards. The guy barely sat down before starting to throw around substantial sums. He was placing serious bets all over the table. After several consecutive losses, his mood changed and he began to threaten that he would throw a metal ashtray at the dealer.